Losing a loved one is never easy, and you never know how it will affect you until it happens.
Even if you’re normally a stable and contained person, sudden grief can cause you to “lose it”—which can be concerning for you, your family, and your friends.
So it’s important to understand the grieving process in order to make decisions that support your health and healing.
Don’t Avoid Your Feelings
Painful feelings can arise at any time, even if you think that you’re at peace.
You may feel a rush of emotion while waiting in line to order coffee, during a meeting, or while running on the treadmill.
And while it may be convenient to push your feelings down or “just get through it”, they’ll still be under the surface waiting for your next vulnerable moment.
So instead of avoiding the tears, honor your grief and feel the pain of your broken heart. You’ll come through
the other side with more peace and less anxiety.
Establish Your Goals
A loss can be a jarring reminder of your own mortality, which forces you to question your life choices.
If you’ve been surviving but not thriving, or if your current career doesn’t fulfill you, then it may be time to make a change. You’re never too old or too established to start a new journey!
For example, you could consider going back to school for a bachelor’s, master’s, or doctorate degree that will propel you toward your goals. An accredited online program allows you to study while working and running a household.
Plus, many schools offer competitive tuition rates as well as financial aid options for non-traditional students.
Be Patient With the Process
When you’re deep in sorrow, it may seem as if there’s no light at the end of the tunnel.
According to psychologist, Taryn Gammon, dealing with grief is like raising a child. At first, it needs constant care. As time goes on, it requires less of your attention, but when it does pop back in, you sit with it for a while.
So no matter where you are in your grieving process, it’s important to have a plan for difficult days and to rely on your coping tools.
It’s okay if you find peace sooner than expected, and it’s also okay if it takes years for you to be okay.
Do the Things That You Love
There’s no right way to grieve, and while you should embrace the process, it can be overwhelming.
So hobbies are a wonderful way to deal with the pain of loss because they stimulate the pleasure center of your brain and elevate your mood.
For example, if painting reminds you of pleasant moments with your deceased loved one, and participating in the creative method makes you feel good about yourself, then it can be a healthy recovery tool for your personal grieving journey!
Regardless of the activity that you choose, though, regular practice is essential for your mental and emotional health during this difficult period of your life.
Grief is your body’s natural response to loss, but overcoming it is deliberate and tough work.
You may not experience heartache the same way that others do, but if you’re engaged and open-minded about the stages of grief, you’ll emerge strong, grateful, and at peace with yourself.
Do you know of any other tips that aren’t shared above? Share in the comments below!
A special thanks to Camille Johnson of The Bereaver.
Resources
“4 Mood and Energy Boosters.” Health Matters, Health Matters, 15 Feb. 2022, https://healthmatters.idaho.gov/5-mood-and-energy-boosters/.
“Anxiety.” Harvard Health, https://www.health.harvard.edu/topics/anxiety.
Brûlê, Geneviève. “Healing Tools for Grief, Loss, and Change.” Wellnstrong, 20 Dec. 2020, https://wellnstrong.com/healing-tools-for-grief-loss-and-change/.
“Career-Relevant Online Degree Programs.” University of Phoenix, https://www.phoenix.edu/degrees.html.
Friedman, Freda. Healing Through Grief, 12 May 2021, https://www.cathedralcounseling.org/resources/blog/healing-through-grief.
“Finding Peace When Coping With Grief & Loss.” Harbor Light Hospice, 12 Mar. 2020, https://www.harborlighthospice.com/blog/finding-peace-when-coping-with-grief-loss/.
“Grief and Bereavement.” American Cancer Society, 10 May 2019, https://www.cancer.org/treatment/end-of-life-care/grief-and-loss/grieving-process.html.
Peterson, Tanya J. “What Is Emotional Health? And How to Improve It?” HealthyPlace, 23 Oct. 2019, https://www.healthyplace.com/other-info/mental-illness-overview/what-is-emotional-health-and-how-to-improve-it.
Ward, Katherine. “About.” Grief Personalized, 21 Jan. 2022, https://griefpersonalized.com/about/.